Monday, June 24, 2013

Lub Dub, Lub Dub


Two weeks ago I spent two-and-a-half hours at the doctor's office--shirtless--as a nurse made three hundred attempts to get this holter monitor to work. She'd hold up her cheat sheet, stick a few stickies on my chest, attach the electrodes color-by-color, turn on the monitor, wait for the blinking green light.... yellow, yellow, yellow.... remove all electrodes, remove batteries, remove memory card, reattach stickies and electrodes, wait for the blinking green light.... still flashing yellow, rinse and repeat. After that unsuccessful appointment I was glad to hear that I wouldn't need to go back for some time to try again to put on this heart monitor.

This morning was round 2, and the nurse was able to get the thing to work on the second try.

Of course two weeks ago we weren't in this heatwave.

This monitor is just a precaution, really, because every time I go into the hospital for thyroid cancer issues my heart overreacts and I'm hooked up to a bunch of EKG machines and blood pressure cuffs. When I mentioned to my PCP that I have pretty rough palpitations now and then he prescribed a 24-hour holter monitor "just to be safe".

And since heart disease is a number one killer of women, I am more than happy with being safe. Especially because I experience heart pain often and am hypocalcemic. A lack of calcium affects muscles, the heart included.


I'm supposed to be writing down all of my activities for the next 24-hours, recording all exercise (yeah right), resting periods (fingers crossed I get eight hours tonight), sexual activity (who would have sex while wearing a heart monitor??), and the like. Here's what I've got written down so far:

10:30AM: took the kids for a walk in the thousand-degree weather to the town hall. Pushed one child in a stroller while wearing a baby in a moby wrap.
11:30AM - 3PM: Photo shoots and wrestling kids to eat lunch, wash hands, use potty, etc. etc.
3:00 - 6PM: Played with kids, watched movie, had dinner. Blah blah blah.
7:46PM: Son took first poop in the big boy potty on his own. No assistance. I expect to go absolute tachycardic at 7:46.

And now it's time for rest.