Happy (?) RAI eve! Tomorrow I will be swallowing a decent dose of radiation to hopefully rid myself of cancer. On the bright side, I will probably have a better meal selection at the hospital. I've run out of things I will eat around here. Today I had an apple, a sweet potato with syrup, and an iodine-free blueberry muffin.
Another thing happened: Sean came home from work looking as gray as an elephant. These past few days I have felt as if I had been run over by several trucks and am still not feeling great, but now that Sean seems to be exhibiting the same symptoms I'm placing bets that this has been a flu bug and not all hypothyroidism as I suspected. Dylan was crying last night after he landed himself in time out and he threw up all over his chair and twice more when I carried him to the bathroom. So is he sick, too? I mean beyond the head cold that all four of us have contracted? Either way this cannot come at a worse time. The last thing Sean needs is to feel miserable while trying to care for two sick babies..and drive me to the hospital in the morning.
I go back and forth with how I'm handling this. Part of me is prepared and ready to get it over with, part is distraught at the thought of leaving my family, and a part of me--the part that will be living in a plastic-covered room for three days--feels like the boy in my 6th grade home room who was sprayed by a skunk and everyone called him "skunk boy" until high school.
I will be skunk boy. And gladly so if it means that I no longer have cancer.